The unannounced road-works and the pneumatic drill; the roaring planes and the torrential rain pounding on the glass roof; the whistling lamp and the record-breaking peel of church bells.

Yes, our brave sound guys battled valiantly on...

Oh My God - what do we do about the missing tea-mug? And what about the blood - we need more blood! Holy Mother of Robocop - that Steadicam’s amazing! What do you mean we have to be out of this room by 3 o’clock?!

Yes our terrific team soldiered on...

We’ve rehearsed it, we’ve story-boarded it, we’ve shot-listed it, we’ve scheduled it, we’ve blocked it, we’ve dressed it... “Everyone hold it there” - it’s the very first scene of the shoot and Bruce has gone and knocked the yoghurt pot over! What do you mean we’ve got no more yoghurt? Quick, mayonnaise, we need mayonnaise... stuff it with bananas! Let’s keep those sausages fluffed and clean - someone wipe my sausage now!! Get that moustache stuck down; who’s been eating the f*cking grapes?! 

Er... is it really a good idea to let Bruce hurl a brick at that Grade II listed church window...?   Bruce... PUT DOWN THE AXE!!!